Our Subconscious Must Be An Idiot!
(Band information at the bottom of this post!!!)
The brainwashing of my parents has trickled down into the simplest of things in my lifestyle now. I have discovered something about this thing they call "Health Food". Aside from how much it sucks, I have discovered the absence of what discriminates one food from the other, I have found that this "Health Food" they speak of has no flavor whatsoever. Imagine biting into a chewable version of plywood. I say "chewable", but sometimes the gag reaction in the back of my throat prevents such things, and I say "plywood", but I've actually tasted plywood, and it has more of a flavor than this "Health Food".
I have just come to a realization. When I was in the Juvenile Detention Center, I always thought that the food had no flavor, and couldn't wait to get home to have a good "Home-Cooked Meal", but when your "Home-Cooked Meals" start having less flavor than the food at JDC, and you begin fantasizing about the green beans (or whatever that was) back in JDC, something is deathly wrong with your household.
What happened to the Herb-Roasted Chicken with the Golden Sauce of the past? Now my chicken reminds me of the pig fetus I dissected in 8th grade Physical Science.
Whatever happened to the Old-Fashioned Cajun Jambalaya, that came from my aunt's recipe when she lived in Louisiana? Now my rice is gummy and naked of spicy goodness. It's kind of confusing when your rice feels like really watered down oatmeal in your mouth. You start questioning what time of the day it is.
As for the green beans, which were the only thing I wouldn't eat before any of this culinary blasphemy began, they remain the same as before. I'm slowly realizing that this is becoming a lose-lose situation for my taste buds.
I remember how my parents used to tell me to finish my plate, because there were starving children in Africa who were eating clay to relieve their hunger (which I replied, "Let them come over to our house, they can eat here."). Now my parents are purposely leaving portions of their plate uneaten, in order to "Trick their minds into thinking that is all they need to feel full". Trick their minds? They are telling their minds "I don't need to eat that portion of my food so I can trick my mind into thinking I don't need it". You would think that your subconscious would be a little smarter than that, if you're telling it what you're going to do to trick it. Their subconscious must be an idiot if it doesn't catch that one!
I guess I'm going to go point and laugh at my parents' subconscious, just walk up to them and point at their brain and say "Haha! Your subconscious is retarded!"
On a side note, I have decided that if I lose weight as a result of my parents' brainwashing, it will only be because of malnutrition and lack of appetite. If this occurs, I have made the decision to make the decision to sue McDonald's. It's not that McDonald's would have anything to do with my weight loss. In fact, the words "McDonald's" and "weight loss" seem to create a paradox of mass proportions (pun intended). My logic is that McDonald's simply has a lot of money lying around that they probably won't ever use, except to give to homeless charities in attempt to feel better about their selves for helping cause America's obesity problem. That's probably what I'll do. I'll sue McDonald's if I lose weight from my parents' brainwashing. It makes a lot of sense to me at least.
If my scanner worked right now, I would all entertain your eyes with my artwork, but since it doesn't, I guess that's too bad for you.
Untitled and possibly unfinished
Have you ever
stepped back to stare
life straight in the face,
Tear away what matters
and then erase
the irrelevant things
that cause malevolent rings
to form around eyes
lying in dormant disguise
Ignoring the eccentric mendacities
While revealing the truths in life?
So suprising is the uprising
of a singularly eclipsed
reality reality amidst
idealist corruption of lips.
Again, our band plays February 18th at the Hot Springs Mall. Here's the flyer.
Deuces,
Caleb
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